It’s been (another) one of those weeks. You know the kind I’m talking about? Where no matter how carefully you plan, your plans blow up like a grenade hit them, one thing does lead to the other and no, absolutely none of it is something you can ignore and not deal with or there will be serious consequences. The coffee is ALWAYS cold no matter how many times you heat it, at least one of your children is constantly doing the finding boundaries/pushing buttons thing like their life depends on it (which in all fairness, it kind of does…) and the related tantrums to the boundary finding are ALWAYS in a public place you cannot escape from quickly and somehow always around judgmental folks that apparently were never children themselves but dropped from magical trees as fully poised perfectly behaved beings. And so you find yourself vacillating quicker than ever between feelings of passionate unstoppable burning love and pride in your kids and yourself to feeling like the most inept mother ever and wanting to drown in your continuously cold coffee.
I mean forget when it rains it pours cause sometimes it can feel more like when it rains it SNOW STORMS BIG A** ICE PELLETS.
I’ve set a scripture reminder to go off periodically through the day, and lately it’s been especially helpful. It doesn’t mean I am always zen and collected and that life never rattles me but at the least it helps me feel a tiny bit better because if nothing else because it reminds me I am trying. I read the scripture, and I take a big breath. It doesn’t mean I am instantly calm and everything falls immediately into place, but I am trying to be the best mom I can be. I do want to teach my kids to focus on the present, to let the past go, and to trust for the future. And it’s a struggle for me, some days more than others, but I AM TRYING.
And really that is what matters. We are trying. Even on the bad days, the failure days, the crawl under a blanket and cry by the potty days. We are trying. And really what does matter is how many times we get back up, not how many times we fall down. So cheers to cold coffee and warm hugs mamas, have a beautiful week!